「世界中のどこかの片隅で」 　ハワイあたりの怪しい店屋で 毛ぇが欲しいんや I wanna under hair どのようなタイプのカツラがお好みですか　これなんかどうですか What kind of wig would you prefer? How about this one? 浪速おんな２３年ものや I want a 23-year-old Naniwa woman. 今、なんとおっしゃりましたか What did you just say? ２度もいわすな　浪速おんな２３年ものや Don't make me repeat myself. A 23-year-old Naniwa woman. いけません　お客さん、うちは違法な商品は扱っていません I'm sorry sir, but we don't deal in illegal merchandise. なにが違法やねん　ここヘヤー・ショップやろ What's illegal about it? This is a hair shop, isn't it? お客さんわかって言ってるでしょう　浪速おんなエイジド２３は１９９９年に法律で禁止されました You know exactly what you're asking for. 23-year-old Naniwa women were banned by law in 1999. ホンマなんかいな　わてな、あれがないといてもたってもいられんのや Are you serious? I can't live without that stuff. 泣き言をいいにきたんですか　帰ってください Did you come here to whine? Please leave. ホンマはあるんやろ　なあ、店の奥に隠してるやろ You really have some, don't you? Come on, you're hiding it in the back of the store. いくら持っているんですか How much money do you have? クレジット払いや I'll pay by credit card. 素人さんお帰りなさい そげなものクレジットで売れると思っているのですか Go home, amateur. Do you think we'd sell something like that on credit? １万持ってきとる I've got ten thousand. 京おんなエイジド１９ならあります We have a 19-year-old Kyoto woman available. あかんあかん　浪速もんやないとあかんのや　わかるやろ No way. It has to be from Naniwa, you understand? 京おんなエイジド１９はマニア垂涎の人気商品なんですがね　色も白いし The 19-year-old Kyoto woman is a popular item that collectors drool over. And the color is so fair. あかん言うとるやろ I told you no! 広島おんなエイジド２８ならあります　名器ですよ We have a 28-year-old Hiroshima woman. It's a masterpiece. それ、ちょっと見せてや Let me take a look at that. これです　たまらんでしょう Here it is. Irresistible, isn't it? ごおおおおー　これはええものやないか Whoooooa! This is incredible! でしょう？ Right? 壁に両手をつけや　オドレには黙秘する権利がある　わーはFBIや　ヘタ打ったのおワレ Put both hands on the wall. You have the right to remain silent. I'm FBI. You messed up big time. バッジ見せい Show me your badge. バッジ？　なんのことや Badge? What are you talking about? 商品持ち去ろうとしてるだろ？ You're trying to steal the merchandise, aren't you? わーはホンマもんのFBIやで？　疑ったらあかんで？ I'm a real FBI agent. Don't doubt me. だったらバッジを見せなさい Then show me your badge. 忘れた　職場のデスクん中や I forgot it. It's in my desk at work. じゃ取りに帰れよ Then go back and get it. しゃーないな、出直すかあ Well, can't be helped. I'll come back later. もう来なくていいですよ？ Please don't bother coming back.